Why do men struggle in the dating scene?

November 7, 2017

This is an interesting topic, the reasons won't be the same for every man because they all have different flaws, qualities and personalities but we will get through as much we can.



1. Men are attracted to the wrong person.

Everyone wants what's trending now and with women that's what's happening. So what's trending? Money grabbers, women who want rich men and a high calibre lifestyle. If you're not into that then you're headed for disaster. You can't change someones likes and wants, if they're looking to pursue someone of this nature then you'll have to live up to that or the relationship will end quick.

Look for someone like yourself, with the same interests and outlook in life, I think you can sift through people without getting too far into a conversation. We all want what is attractive to the eye, or whatever everyone else has but maybe that isn't what will make you happy in the end. Don't waste your time and energy on someone who wants your money first or interested in what you can offer them. If your mentality isn't that way then that person isn't for you. There are men out there who like to provide what a woman wants materialistically, as long as they can have what his eyes like, or rather his ego.


2. Don't approach a woman in a sleazy way, have some class and personality.  

Are we still listening to the same blah blah blah from men? Yes we are! Be Gentle, compliment, ask questions about life and future. This isn't the bunny ranch! Drop the ego at the door and try to get to know a person by asking questions about who they are and where they come from. Don't look at other women around you because that sends a red flag, stay focused on what is in front of you, don't talk about yourself unless she asks dammit, this isn't about you its about her.


3. Don't brush up on women to send your interest.

 This really sends the wrong message, tap on the shoulder or the middle of the back and ask her if she's interested in having a drink with you or ask if she's single first. Don't pressure a situation or you'll be left with a lot of money missing from your wallet and no potential girlfriend.


4. If you're really shy, send a drink with the waiter or waitress with a note on the napkin. 

" I think you're beautiful, if you would like to get to know me here is my number ###" There is no need to be pushy, sometimes it gives the person time from far away to assess you.  The waiter can be your mediator, try it, it's quite fun, It won't guarantee you'll get a date or even a conversation but you can be mild in your approach. A confident women will approach you if she's looking for someone as well. Once she approaches, ask questions about her, do you due diligence and screen for the money grabbers. There is a difference between a money grabber and a person who wants a quality man.


5. If you got kids, try and stick with women who have kids too.  

To be straight up, no one wants to be with a man with other commitments. Dating a guy with kids and the girl doesn't have kids isn't the most appealing situation. I can tell you I don't like to. So I stay away from that, it's not for me and I would like to build my own family.  Think about it like this, Would you like your daughter to date a man with kids and an ex wife when she has never married or had children? Thank you.


6. Stay away from immaturity.

Women who act like crazy party goer's and drunks at the bar or lounge, won't be the best option for you. You'll be a babysitter everytime you go out and that doesn't seem like a serious, mature girl for a promising future. 


7. Women that are too young for you.

Are you kidding me? Men love going after young women that are just not on their mental frequency, what are you guys thinking? Again, that's the ego and of course just thinking with the lower part of your existence. That won't get you far. A smart man needs mental stimulation and which a young girl just hasn't grown into yet so,  pick a ripe fruit, not unripe, meaning, a person that's ready for what you want in life and that will take you seriously, only then you'll both be on the same page and can build a life you really want.

In my opinion, the same age or 6 year age difference tops guys! 


8. Don't play games.

If you're unsure of what direction you want a relationship to go in then say it, don't create problems just so women get pissed off with you and dump you because that was what you wanted but didn't have enough integrity to tell her.  If you want respect then give it back the same exact way. If you have a passcode on your phone, the chances are very high that you're hiding something and vice versa.  There are no secrets in a loving relationship. We also don't "take breaks" or act like your friends but are intimate when it's convenient, you're playing with peoples emotions and stability. We call those, "flakey people"


9. Lay your cards on the table.

Women don't have a lot of time to figure you out, tell her what your intentions are form the get go and move forward. Too much time wasted will bore women and it will just seem like you're trying to get in their pants or just show them off. We are not dumb you know...


In the end its all about compatibility and respect, these two things will be there naturally from the beginning, use your intuition and intellect to sift out flakey and unstable people who only want to to use you because they're insecure or unstable, then proceed with the fundamentals. Be honest with yourself about what type of person will match your lifestyle then look for quality characteristics within that person. Be an honest gentleman, women want that, it's scarce nowadays.


Remember, your life is important and the proper person will add to your life in so many different positive ways. Being Honest will leave you feeling empowered.


Always bring out your best wine first.




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